What to Write in a Condolence Card
Messages, Sayings & Personal Words for Every Situation
When someone we care about loses a loved one, it’s often hard to find the right words. Yet a few heartfelt lines can offer comfort and support in times of grief.
In this guide, you’ll find inspiration for what to write in a condolence card – whether for a close friend, a neighbour, extended family or a colleague. We’ve gathered thoughtful texts for condolence cards, fitting sympathy quotes, and helpful tips on structure, tone, and addressing the envelope.
Related pages: Funeral bouquets | Condolence bouquets
How to Write a Condolence Card
Writing a condolence card isn’t easy. Grief is deeply personal, and expressing sympathy can feel overwhelming – especially when your relationship with the deceased or their family is either very close or quite distant.
Above all, be sincere and gentle. Whether you’re writing to the family of an elderly person, a grieving friend, or a neighbour, the goal is to offer genuine compassion and comfort.
What to Write in a Condolence Card – Structure & Tips
A typical condolence card includes:
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Greeting: Dear Anna / Dear Mrs Smith / To the Müller Family
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Opening line: Expressing sadness or sympathy
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Main message: Sharing memories, offering support
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Closing sentiment: Wishing strength or peace
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Farewell & Signature
Here's a hort example:
We were heartbroken to hear of your father’s passing. Please accept our heartfelt condolences and know that we are thinking of you.
Examples of What to Write in a Condolence Card
For a friend:
Your mother was a wonderful person, and I’ll miss her dearly. Sending you all my love and strength.
For a neighbour:
We were so sorry to hear about your husband’s passing. Please know that you are in our thoughts.
For distant relatives or colleagues:
Please accept our sincere condolences. May your memories bring you comfort during this difficult time.
For an elderly person:
A long, well-lived life has come to an end. We are thinking of you and sending peaceful thoughts.
Short and Gentle Sayings for Sympathy Cards
Sometimes just a few words can speak volumes. Here are some popular and comforting short sympathy quotes you can include:
- With deepest sympathy
- In loving memory
- Those we love don’t go away, they walk beside us every day
- What remains is love and memory
- Gone from our sight, but never from our hearts
Condolence Card Text Templates
If you’re not sure where to start, here are a few ready-to-use condolence messages you can personalise:
Short condolence card template:
Sending heartfelt condolences and wishing you strength in the days ahead. Thinking of you with sympathy.
For a grieving family:
Dear Müller Family, we are deeply saddened by your loss and send you our sincere condolences and warmest thoughts.
Should You Include Money in a Condolence Card?
Whether or not to include money in a condolence card depends on local customs and your relationship with the family. In some areas, it’s traditional to give a small amount of money for flowers or a memorial fund.
Example wording:
Instead of flowers, please accept this small gesture in memory of [Name].
Can You Write a Modern Condolence Card?
Yes – a modern condolence card can still be respectful. You might choose a card with a soft floral design, a nature motif, or a more informal tone, as long as the message is heartfelt and considerate. Sharing memories, photos or even small moments of joy can also bring comfort.
Frequently Asked Questions about Writing a Condolence Card
A condolence card should express sympathy and support. Depending on your relationship with the deceased or their loved ones, you might share a personal memory, offer words of comfort, or simply express your sorrow. The most important thing is to be sincere and compassionate.
Use a respectful and gentle tone. You can acknowledge the long, meaningful life of the person and offer comfort to the bereaved.
Here is an example: “We remember a life well lived with deep gratitude. Our thoughts are with you.”
Here are some heartfelt phrases:
“In loving memory.”
“What remains is love and beautiful memories.”
“You may be gone from sight, but you are never gone from our hearts.”
“The ones we love never truly leave us.”
In some cultures, it's customary to include a small amount of money as a gesture of support (e.g. for flowers or a memorial donation). Amounts typically range from €10 to €50, depending on your relationship to the deceased. When in doubt, keep it simple and discreet.
You can include a thoughtful note such as:
“Instead of flowers, please accept this small gift as a token of our sympathy.”
“We would like to make a small contribution in [Name]’s memory.”
Keep it simple and respectful:
To the family of [Surname]
To Mr/Mrs [Full Name]
You may also add “With deepest sympathy” below the name. Use a neutral-coloured envelope without decoration.
Keep your message warm but reserved. Here is an example:
“We were deeply saddened to hear of your husband’s passing. Our thoughts are with you during this difficult time.”
Finish your condolence card with a comforting phrase:
“Wishing you strength and peace.”
“With heartfelt sympathy.”
“In loving memory.”
Sudden losses are especially difficult. A message like this can be supportive:
“We are deeply shocked and saddened. Our hearts go out to you and your family.”
Close your message of your condolence card with one of the following:
“With deepest sympathy, [Your Name]”
“Thinking of you, [Your Name]”
“With love and condolences, [Name of your family or group]”